Carriaged Away

Text: Simon Hill and Gabrielle Gray. Article from the September 2013 issue of Compleat Golfer Magazine.

A nine-day Rovos Rail golf safari aboard what’s punted as the world’s most luxurious train and normal life never looked so bland.

Day 1

Simon and Gabbi

With suitcases far bigger than were necessary, we arrived at Rovos Rail’s station in Pretoria. As we pulled up to the front doors of Capital Park, porters wearing green jackets and pillbox hats sprang to life and rushed forward to meet us and relieve us of our cumbersome baggage.

After being ushered into the plush waiting room, we enjoyed champagne and canapes – something we would grow far too accustomed to – as we tried to unobtrusively ‘check out’ who we would be spending the next nine days with. A heartfelt and very sweet send-off from the managing director himself, Rohan Vos – who has apparently not missed a departure since the first trip to the then Eastern Transvaal in 1989 – and we were shown to our deluxe cabin and introduced to Portia, our go-to lady for the duration of our stay. The next few hours were definitely not spent drinking more champagne from our minibar and sending smug messages to anyone we’ve spoken to in the last five years. Oh no. That would just be childish…

As we chugged our way towards the small farming community of Koster in the North West, our first overnight stop, we familiarised ourselves with the layout of the train. Purchased by Vos from the old South African Railways and lovingly restored over the years, the carriages instantly whisk one away to a bygone era of rail travel in South Africa: a time of waistcoats and evening gowns, cigars and pocket watches.

With the location of the drinks and dining cars now properly established, we sat down for our first meal on board: a three-course gourmet lunch with wine pairings to match. Eating like royalty is something you will have to get used to while on Rovos Rail. They take the business of feeding you very seriously indeed, and an immense amount of preparation is involved in catering for everyone on board.

We chatted to chefs Darius Masilo and Dominique Barnard, who both explained the difficulties of preparing fine-dining menus in a space that is not only small (roughly 15×2 metres), but also constantly jiggling around as the train moves. Imagine trying to cook a meal worthy of Michelin stars while on a jumping castle, and you kind of get the idea. “Sometimes it’s hard and you will step on each other’s toes – literally! Communication is very important. But it helps you think ahead and work as a team,” said Darius, who has more than 10 years’experience as a head chef.

“There is something very special about the game of golf that manages to transcend language and cultural barriers…”

They have to learn some neat tricks too, such as putting a grater into a pot of boiling water to prevent it from splashing. Two hours’ preparation time for each meal is required and all ingredients travel on the train with them. Nothing goes to waste either – all food that is not eaten is stored and given to workers who remove the waste from the train.

Day 2

Gabbi

Portia’s gentle knock on the door of our cabin (our ‘alarm clock’ for the days to follow) came at 6am, and we were up for day two. While the rocking of the moving train took some getting used to for me, Simon slept as he usually does: solidly. I was excited – today we would be visiting Sun City and the Pilanesberg Game Reserve. Moreover, I would be meeting the other ‘golf widows’.

Not so. It seems women play golf these days – and even better than a lot of men, I might add, as fellow passenger Delight Ngcamu-Aitken would soon demonstrate.

And so while Simon drove off in his golf cart, I found myself with four extremely well-travelled, retired Australians – fresh off their 450th trip on the Queen Mary 2 – and Anne, a shopaholic who had met her South African husband while serving eight years in Iraq. This was not going to be your average tour group. Everyone’s varied tastes and opinions on what we should do during our ‘day trips’ soon became apparent and it seemed an interesting journey awaited us.

Thankfully, our seasoned guide in the Pilanesberg Game Reserve pleased everyone. After our successful safari, we ate lunch at the Gary Player clubhouse before venturing into the Kwena Gardens, to get up close and personal with some of the world’s largest captive crocodiles. Giant prehistoric reptiles aren’t for everyone though, so some skipped this and went shopping at the Entertainment Centre instead.

Simon

Day one of the safari and what a way to start – Gary Player Country Club. Despite having played there on numerous occasions, I still get goosebumps when I walkthrough the foyer and glance at the photos of past champions on the wall: Frost, Els, Price, Ballesteros, Langer and Westwood. All have traversed its fairways and greens and to me it is still the Holy Grail of South African golf.

As one of only two ‘Saffers’ on the tour, I was at a slight advantage, having seen this testing layout before. Most of the European contingent struggled, as do many locals the first time they tee it up here. On the whole though, everyone seemed to enjoy the home of Africa’s Major, despite sacrificing a large portion of their allotted golf balls to the dams in front of the 9th and 18th greens.

There is something very special about the game of golf that manages to transcend language and cultural barriers, and it wasn’t long before it felt as though I’d known my German playing partners, Heike and Werner, for a far greater time than the five hours we spent together on the course. Tour coordinator and qualified PGA teaching pro Alywn Vorster structured games in such a way as to allow as much interaction between guests as possible, something I quickly discovered translates into a superb time once on board again.

Day 3

Simon and Gabbi

After the excitement of the previous day’s activities (and a healthy sampling of the fine wines the night before), we enjoyed a ‘day at leisure’ on the train.The timing was perfect too, as we trundled towards Estcourt and the KwaZulu-Natal Midlands, home to many an Anglo-Boer War battle site, the majestic Drakensberg Mountains and Champagne Sports Resort, where our second game of the safari would take place.

Day 4

Gabbi

As a South African who has never spent any time in the Drakensberg, I was particularly excited about the day trip to this part of the country. Raymond Heron, storyteller extraordinaire, was our tour guide and is the resident battlefield expert of KwaZulu-Natal. He conducts tours from his beautiful colonial-style farm and guesthouse, SpionKop Lodge, which was our base for the day. His concern in ensuring everyone got to do’a bit of what they liked’ was touching, and he made a point of letting us do some shopping at Thokiziwa village before we got into the nitty-gritty of the battlefield excursion.

The area was once the site of clashes between the Zulus, British and Boers, the “most futile and bloodiest” of those being the battle of Spion Kop, as Raymond explained. Atop the koppie with the valley spread below, he regaled us with the tale of the battle at which General Louis Botha, Winston Churchill and Mahatma Gandhi were all present. I’m not sure my foreign counterparts enjoyed it quite as much as I did, but if you’re a history buff I highly recommend it – especially with Ray as your guide. He’s “easy on the eye”, as Pauline (68) from Australia confided.

Simon

It was against the resplendent backdrop of Champagne Castle and Cathkin Peak that we teed it up for our second game of the safari. Designed by two South African sporting legends, Hugh Baiocchi and Kevin Curren, Champagne Sports uses the natural attributes of the surrounding terrain to maximum effect. At just over 6 200 metres off the club tees, the course is extremely undulating and changes in elevation are sharp. Bunkers are plentiful and wayward shots are harshly penalised. Fortunately, the bonding done between Sun City and Estcourt among group members, most of it in the drinks car, ensured that team morale was at an all-time high, despite the relatively low standard of golf.

It’s at this point that I need to make mention of some of the logistics that go into putting a Rovos Rail golf safari together, because it really is quite something. While on board, a luxury coach follows the train and meets you at each destination. You’re then transported to the golf course, where your golf bags are waiting (note: the last time you physically pick up your bags – or any bag for that matter – is when you take them out of your boot at the Rovos station). Caddies await your arrival at each course, as well as complimentary drinks.

All meals and beverages outside the train are included. The only time you take out your wallet is to tip the caddie.

After the round, you are brought back to the train for high tea and a pre-dinner nap. By this time, your shoes have been polished, your room turned down and your laundry from the previous day returned neatly washed and pressed.

It’s as horrible as it sounds.

Day 5

Gabbi

From the rolling beauty of the Midlands, we travelled overnight to Durban.The golfers were up early for their round at Durban Country Club, and soon enough us non-golfers were ushered into our tour bus with Shiney Bright (real name), who would be our guide for the day. As 80 percent of the group had disembarked from the Queen Mary 2 in Durban on numerous occasions, they were more familiar with the city’s attractions than even Shiney Bright and I.

This was going to be no easy task. Luckily, it was not Shiney’s first rodeo, and so off we went to the traditional healers’ market just off Victoria Street in downtown Durban. Being a Sunday and all, I was assuming we’d see a few curios and possibly a palm leaf or two holding some exotic-looking spices. Wrong again. Shiney deftly led us through the maze of taxis into the traditional market. The carcasses of various small animals and birds strung up behind row upon row of dried leaves and bark was definitely a scene my tourist friends had not encountered before. Rather than balk at the sights and smells, they took a keen interest in all the knowledge that Shiney was able to impart, which was extensive. One obliging sangoma even posed for a photograph, which I hear is apparently quite rare.

Simon

Durban Country Club is a stalwart on the South African golfing landscape and was the third course on our safari.The venue has played host to several South African Opens over the years and is the current home of the Volvo Golf Champions.

At just over 6 100 metres, Country Club is certainly not long by any stretch of the imagination. However, what it lacks in length it makes up for in dense bush and narrow fairways. Precision off the tee is absolutely vital, especially in the wind, which often blows here and tends to accentuate a bad shot.

Flanked by the Indian Ocean, you are at the mercy of the elements, while fast greens with subtle breaks ensure any momentary lapses in concentration are severely punished. Once again, I had the advantage of having played there before and had a really nice round, which I cannot say for the other members of the touring party, who found the miserly fairways rather difficult to hit.

Nevertheless, it’s still a great challenge and was enjoyed by many of the UK contingent, who said it reminded them of a layout back in Blighty.

Having ‘conquered’ Country Club, we returned to the train for a night of travel towards the town of Hluhluwe. Jacket and tie for dinner was now second nature for the men, while the ladies continued to dazzle in their vast and seemingly never-ending supply of evening dresses. What had started out as a rather awkward mishmash of people had transformed into a close-knit group of individuals enjoying each other’s company, cherishing the time spent both on and off the course. Evenings more often than not ended up in the drinks car, where stories were shared and thirsts quenched thanks to Rovos staff, who patiently sat up until all hours serving whatever our hearts desired.

“… A run-in with a particularly grumpy elephant bull made sure we were all wide awake by 10am for our ta and scones at Hilltop camp.”

Day 6

Simon and Gabbi

The Hluhluwe-lmfolozi Park is a 96 453-hectare game reserve in KwaZulu-Natal, home to the world’s largest white rhino population as well as lion, leopard, buffalo, elephant, wild dog, cheetah, giraffe and various antelope species. At 5am, we all wearily climbed onto open-topped safari vehicles and travelled to the park with our guide, George, who we debated was actually present when the park opened in 1897. We accompanied our new Swedish friends Hendrick and Jenna on their first-ever safari and excitedly spotted a herd of giraffe before we even entered the park gates. Five separate rhino encounters (all luckily still with horns intact), various giraffe, buffalo and zebra spottings and a run-in with a particularly grumpy elephant bull made sure we were all wide awake by 10am for our tea and scones at the Hilltop Camp.

Our early morning excursion meant an afternoon of leisure on the train as we casually crossed over the border at Golela into Swaziland. I say ‘casually’, as the border formalities were so efficient and effortless that we had no idea it had even happened. If only it was always that easy…

Day 7

Gabbi

I had never been to Swaziland, and I found the contrast between the two countries quite stark, even down to the landscape. It’s not called a mountain kingdom for nothing. Luckily for me, Jenna the Swede decided to leave her golf clubs aside in favour of discovering this unique little country. However, after a brief history lesson on the number of wives of the previous king (70, to be exact), she was slightly less enthusiastic about the royal heritage than the beautiful surroundings. While driving in the capital city of Mbabane, our guide quite nonchalantly pointed out a man walking down the street with an iPad under his arm. “You see that man there?  That is our minister of finance.” No blue-light brigades here.

We saw more rhino at a small game reserve outside Mbabane and were taken to see the beautiful glassware being made at the famous Ngwenya Glass Factory (also the only time on the entire trip that my wallet was needed). We had lunch at a restaurant run by Finnish expats, which sat in the shadow of Nyonyane Peak – affectionately known as ‘Executioner’s Rock’, after ancient warriors who used to throw their enemies off its highest point. Charming.

We wearily climbed back onto the train, the opulence of which was in heavy contrast to the country in which we stood, and chugged on towards the border and the familiarity of our own land.

Simon

The fourth and penultimate stop on our trip, Royal Swazi, is considered far and away the best course in Swaziland and is a regular feature on the SunshineTour. Great names such as Simon Hobday, Dale Hayes, Mark McNulty and Peter Oosterhuis have all played there and it is a venue rich in history.

By the time we teed it up, our swings were functioning like those of the well-oiled, seasoned pros I’ve just mentioned, and we relished the opportunity of shaping shots into the challenging green complexes. Refurbished in 1996, the course is a tale of two nines – the first being relatively flat, while the second really exploits the slopes of the Lebombo range.

Like Durban Country Club before it, Royal Swazi is not a long layout, but carefully placed bunkers, strategic gullies and punishing water hazards mean that one can never take a par for granted.

Sipping our G &Ts on the balcony after the round, looking down at the valley below, it occurred to me that after seven days we had travelled just more than 1 700 kilometres. We would head towards the border that night and our trip was fast coming to an end. But we had one more course to tick off our list before returning to Pretoria. And it was a biggie.

Day 8

Gabbi

It’s not every day you are given the opportunity to visit one of the world’s most exclusive golf estates, where you can spy on Sylvester Stallone’s and Ernie Els’ houses at the same time. It was with this in mind that I opted to skip the Kruger Park game drive with the non-golfers and be Simon’s golf-cart driver instead.  I’d heard stories of wild animals strolling down the course at Leopard Creek, so I was convinced I’d see some wildlife anyway.

And I was not disappointed with my decision. Granted, I am no expert on fairways and greens and the length of a drive, but this sure is a damn pretty golf course! So while Simon skilfully (he told me to say that) made his way around the beauty that is all 18 holes of the layout, I took in the delicious smell of freshly cut grass on a warm Lowveld day and silently vowed to take up the game, so that I too could play on this stunning course one day.

“…The layout is African Golf at its finest…”

Simon

Owned by business magnate and patriarch of South African golf Johann Rupert, Leopard Creek is South Africa’s top-ranked golf course, which is quite an accolade considering the number of outstanding layouts this country has. Bordered to the north and the west by the Crocodile River and the Kruger National Park, the layout is African golf at its finest and one cannot simply book a tee time. Greenfees are expensive and you have to be invited by a member to play. It is testimony to Rovos Rail’s good standing that our tour party was allowed to tee it up here.

Doing a course like Leopard Creek justice in a few words is impossible. As the home of the Alfred Dunhill Championship, we’ve all seen its grandeur displayed on TV.  Giraffe roam the fairways and, as my chauffeur Gabbi mentioned, Ernie Els and Sly Stallone deem it worthy enough to have a house here. Quite simply, it is idyllic There is not a blade of grass out of place.  Everything has been thought through.

As a group, we’d been waiting eight days to play it – talking about it at great length over dinner – and it had not let a single one of us down. You’ll love it. Especially the par-five 13th, which is as beautiful as it looks in HD on your TV.

Simon and Gabbi

Our final evening on board the train was something very special. Given what we’d experienced up until then, I don’t say this lightly but, not for the first time, Daphne Mabala and her team managed to surprise. Crayfish and chocolate fondant accompanied by 2008 Meerlust Rubicon are the lasting memories we’ll have of our final night on the Pride of Africa as we meandered back to Capital Park. Well, that and the prizegiving, followed by the strangest putting competition you’ll ever care to witness in the drinks car.

Oh, and the smooth cognac. That’s what we’ll remember, as well as the friends we made, the courses Simon played and the memories we’ll cherish until our dying day. Or until we go again. We’re hoping, of course, it’s the latter.

Day 9

Simon and Gabbi

With sore heads, we unhappily packed our bags for our departure. The usually bustling train was quiet as we all ate our breakfasts in silence, depressed that our trip had come to an end. The thought of going back to normal life, with no hot towels and warms smiles to greet us whenever we returned from anywhere, was almost too much to bear.

As we hitched the carriages to the old steam locomotive in preparation for our grand homecoming, we topped it off as we began: with a glass of champagne, toasting not only our new friends, but also to the trip of a lifetime aboard  ‘the most luxurious train in the world’.

Rovos Rail

Rovos Rail is a private railway company started in 1989 by Rohan Vos. The train operates out of Pretoria and visits the likes of Durban, Cape Town, Victoria Falls (Zimbabwe), Swakopmund (Namibia), Dar es Salaam (Tazania) and even goes as far as Cairo (Egypt).

Golf Safari Cost (All-Inclusive)

• Pullman suites: R38 000 per person sharing

• Deluxe suites: R57 000 per person sharing

• Royal suites: R75 000 per person sharing

Contact

• 012 315 8242

• reservations@rovos.co.za

• website