How well do you know your lover?
Words: Zukiswa Dlumini. article from the Bona Magazine May 2015.
It’s easy to think that you know the person you’re with very well, but when it comes to details about your partner’s personality and likes, how do you fare?
One of the perks of being in a relationship, especially a long-term one, is having someone who understands your personality, needs, wants and quirks. ‘Being with someone who has taken the time to know you and still chooses to stay is one of the keys things people look for in a relationship,” says counsellor Sizakele Vilakazi.
So, if you’re in a relationship and wonder if you know your partner or if he knows you as well as you would like, this quiz is for you.
Section A
1. Who is your partner’s childhood crush?
2. Which musician would you partner love to see perform live?
3. If your partner could go to any destination in the world, where would that be?
4. If money weren’t an issue, what would your partners dream job be?
5. Do you know what to do to make your partner melt completely?
6. What is your partner’s favourite take-away meal?
7. What Is your partner’s dream car?
8. Where did you and your partner share your first kiss?
9. What’s your partner’s favourite TV show?
10. What does your partner like to do to relax?
Section B
Answer with YES or NO
1. Do you and your partner spend quality time where you don’t discuss bills and children, but just focus on each other?
2. Have you guys laughed together in the post few weeks?
3. Do you often feel like your partner is in love with you?
4. Do you know for a fact that you are in love with your partner?
5. Do you know what is bothering your partner at this point in his life?
6. Do you know what your partner got up to last weekend?
7. Do you know who your partner’s closest friends are at the moment?
8. Do you know what your partner’s favourite song is at moment?
9. Would your partner be able to pick up a gift for you that you love?
10. Do you remember dates that matter to your partner like his birthday, anniversary etc?
FIGURING OUT WHERE YOU STAND
Section A is straightforward, you and your partner should answer the questions separately and then see how each of you fared. This is supposed to be a fun exercise to check how well you know each other. Instead of getting upset when your partner gets an answer wrong, use this as an opportunity to get to know each other better. “The answers to some of these questions are things to discover about each other as you fall in love and get to know each other. It’s good to keep getting to know each other anew as time goes and your interests change. Do this often and you’ll see a fun spark between the two of you,” advises Sizakele.
Section B is a more serious part of the relationship test. If you answered YES to more than five of the questions in this section, it means you and your partner are still in sync. Keep doing things that make you know your partner and remain connected. If you answered NO to more than five questions, you need to look into why you don’t know much about them. “When partners aren’t in a good space, there is a tendency to communicate even less. This creates a gap between couples. Making time to do things together, to just speak to each other and be in the loop of what is happening in each others lives is essential to the relationship. Life, jobs, children and stress are all factors that can make you know your partner less; a concerted effort has to be made in order to stay connected and in love,” says Sizakele.
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