Waiting for 2015
Words: Jenna Oertel, Professional Registered Counsellor. Article from DO IT NOW Magazine.
Health | Fitness
If I can just get that position … If I just get ranked … If I just make that team … If I just get noticed … But I will start next week, no next month, actually maybe 2015 will be better.
Does this sound familiar? If you are nodding your head, don’t worry, you are definitely not alone. In my profession – and life in general – I have come across so many people who are chasing after something, but at the end of the day are left with excuses about why they don’t have what they initially wanted.
Sure we all have unfulfilled goals and desires that we want so badly, but have not met, and which has possibly attribute to why we are not completely happy. But at what point do we need to stop hoping, procrastinating, wanting, waiting for that break and thinking about it rather than doing something about it?
So my question to you is, “How far are you actually from really achieving what you want?” To help you answer this question consider how much time you are wasting on waiting for the right time, thinking about how you are going to get there or waiting for that opportunity. Now think about how in control you are of your success and life, and how much are you the reason for your unachieved goals as a result of not being proactive?
We tend to plod along, waiting and moving the goal post from every Monday in the year to the New Year, 2015.
We just don’t seem to think or find ‘now’ as being the right time to start. We somehow fool ourselves into believing that the upcoming date is a better time to start, a better time to make changes, that a Wednesday doesn’t have the capability of giving us what Monday does. Before you know it, five Mondays have passed, another year has passed and we are left with the same hopes and goals we had when we first started on this road to procrastination. And so the rat race ensues, as you continue to postpone and place your happiness, goals and success into words of soon, maybe, next week, when I feel stronger.
Why are we are always moving the goal post? Are our expectations too high? Or are we just too comfortable within the fact that at least our intentions are good and so we have the ability to blame unfulfilled goals on everything else? Taking responsibility for being in control of our goals and life is what we are not doing. We are the reason why our goals are not achieved.
We set conditions for our happiness/goals and time frames for how, why and when it will happen, but is this thinking not the very thing that keeps us somewhat hopeful, yet entrapped? We keep returning for the same self-created disillusioned hope that we feed ourselves and find comfort knowing there’s still a possibility to succeed and achieve our goals, but just not now. So yes, maybe knowing that having the potential and ability is reason enough to supplement actual success.
Why not now, why not today, why tomorrow, why next year? What are we afraid of? Are we afraid of losing the ability to blame life for why we are not where we want to be if we try? Maybe our fear of inadequacy, possible failure or huge success is the fear that keeps us procrastinating and wallowing in a pool of good intention. What if you and your insecurity is what has put a halt in your growth, your goals and you’re potential?
All you need, and all you will ever need, is what you already have. Remember, the choice to succeed is one only you can make and to do this you need to get back to basics. Wake up every morning with intention rather than excuses, by focussing on these core areas:
• Being aware that you are the reason for where you are now.
• You are the reason for where and who you are going to be.
• Making a daily decision to make each day count.
• Ensuring your day is filled with doing things that help you achieve your goals because boredom and an idle brain allows for too much time to think, which isn’t always a good thing. Too much thought can create excuses, and if you look hard enough to find a reason to procrastinate, you will find it.
• Take the time and look within and be honest about where you are at, where you want to be, how you played a role in not getting there and how badly you want to get there.
Once you have been honest with yourself, you can now go about setting goals for your life that you can look to start achieving from today, as there is no better time. When setting goals however, our goals must be SMART. This means the goals must be:
• S – Sustainable. Create a specific plan of how you can go about achieving your goal. It is too vague to say, “I want to be successful.” Create a plan as to how exactly you want to achieve this.
• M – Meaningful. The goal must be meaningful to YOU and you must really want it. It doesn’t help to train for something because your coach tells you that you have the talent to win, but you do not really enjoy the sport or it is not important for you to win.
• A – Attainable. You must be able to reach your goal. Start with small steps and consider all the negatives and positives. Ask yourself what might be in your way and try to find a way around any obstacles, more often than not you alone are the main obstacle. When training, think of your next training session and what you can do instead of focussing and thinking of the end goal and how hard and long it’s going to take to reach. Everything worthwhile achieving involves hard work. Take one step at a time, not 50. This is often something that tends to overwhelm most people and will make you feel that you want to give up, as the end feels too hard. Break things up into daily tasks and take one day at a time.
• R – Realistic. Your goals must be realistic. Many people set unrealistic goals, such as moving from running 5 km to a marathon within a month. Unrealistic goals cannot be achieved and may make you feel that you have no will power and have failed. Be realistic with your training programme; don’t train too much and get ill. But also don’t train too little to hinder progress.
• T – Time limit. You must set time limits for your goals. If you don’t have a time limit, you can forget about your goals and don’t feel the necessity to work on them every day.
Having spent some time now on why you have procrastinated all year, as well as focussed on what it is you really want, it’s important to write your goals down. This way, you are constantly confronted by them and always reminded of what and why you want it.
It’s useful to also some spend free time visualising yourself having achieved what you wanted and how it felt. Being persistent here and thinking and keeping your goals in mind will help because motivation alone is not always enough.
As you achieve each milestone leading up to the final goal, don’t forget to embrace these smaller achievements and use them to motivate yourself into wanting and getting more. You will be amazed at how quickly time has passed and, as with everything, you can make your goals become a reality by finally moving from wanting it to getting and living it.